UPS how I hate thee

Right now, I am doing battle with the drones at UPS. You see, I was supposed to have a printer delivered today. I’d been checking the status fairly regularly and was relieved when I saw it had reached Dallas yesterday. I had warm fuzzy feelings this morning when I checked again and saw that it was in Fort Worth. Cool. I would have the printer and I could get the work I needed printed taken care of.

Foolish me.

The tracking status of my package was updated at 0930. Suddenly, my package was in limbo. It wasn’t going to be delivered today. In fact, they couldn’t tell me when it would be delivered. You see, the weather made them late. Yep, you read that right. The weather.

Now, if we were in Boston, I’d buy it. Heck I even buy that they might still be behind after the weather we had last week. But color me skeptical when I check another package, one not  due until tomorrow and find out it is out for delivery. Hmmmm. So they can’t deliver something due today but they can delivery something not yet due to be delivered? Something doesn’t smell right.

So, being the onery person that I am, I initiated a chat with UPS CSR. Not that it did me any good. I got the same line. “Unforeseen weather delays…no, I don’t know why the other package was put on a truck to be delivered. . .no, I can’t tell you when you will get your package. . . we’re really sorry but we can’t tell you anything else beyond what is on this little script they’ve given us.”

Okay, I added that last bit but it is the truth because I — and others — have received the exact same explanation, word for word even, from UPS today. Adding to the frustration is this little phrase near the top of the tracking page: Scheduled delivery information is not available at this time. Please check back later.

In other words, we’ll get it there when we darned well want and there’s nothing you can do about it. And, considering it is supposed to ice tomorrow night, I have no doubt that it will be days before I get my printer and I am not a happy camper.

Over the last year to year and a half, UPS has gone from my carrier of choice to the carrier I do my best to avoid. I have had the driver ring the bell or knock maybe twice in that time to let me know my package has been delivered. Once they delivered the package to the wrong address. Instead of trying to contact the driver to find out where my items went, I was told to walk up and down the street to see if I could find it myself. Fortunately, I found the package just next door. Better yet, my neighbor didn’t think I was trying to steal something from them and shoot me before I could explain why I was taking a couple of boxes from their porch.

Yet UPS wants me to have a nice day and they hope I will let them continue to serve me. Not bloody likely. At least not if there are other options available.

UPS, right now Big Brown resembles something my dog leaves in my backyard — and that’s just about the nicest thing I can say.


  1. They may have had an issue like the receptionist at my doctor’s office had happen a couple of weeks ago– I was there when she finally got a straight answer out of them, and her reaction was loud enough to be heard in the waiting room.

    They changed the delivery address to one she’d shipped to before. Away from the one she’d been given a receipt for. And they wanted her to pay extra for rush shipping to get it there ASAP.
    She, ah, did not end up paying extra.

    1. My response to that would have been quite loud — and probably profane — as well. If I could just get a straight answer and if they would tell me when to expect the printer to be delivered, I’d be fine. But this “we will get it to you sometime but we don’t know when and we aren’t even putting an expected delivery date on the tracking page now” BS drives me up a wall.

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